Jane McDonald broke down in tears as she returned to Loose Women for the first time following the death of her long-term partner.
Ed Rothe, who McDonald had been in a relationship with for 13 years, died of lung cancer in March. McDonald shared the news on social media in June, the day after his funeral.
McDonald remained tearful throughout the segment, apologising to the audience and her co-hosts as she cried when introduced.
However, the presenter said that she wanted to speak about Rothe’s death, explaining: “I don’t want to feel sad for the rest of my life, because that wasn’t Ed.
“Ed was golden. He was smiling, he was beautiful. I’ve got to do the first interview, and I couldn’t be with better people here.”
McDonald said that losing Rothe had been “tough” after “13 years of absolute bliss”, but that she was “grateful” for the time she had with him.
“That’s how I’m getting through it,” she said. “I’m not thinking of the last six months because it was horrendous… I’m not good at being sad. I’m not good at this and I’m not good at crying.
“Everyday when I wake up and get that thud like someone’s just hit me, I think, ‘Are you going to go down the dark path where you’ve been for the last year, or are you going to be grateful for everything you’ve got in your life, and grateful for the time you had him and remember him how I want to remember him?’”
As Rothe had grown ill with lung cancer during lockdown, McDonald had had a “crash course in nursing” and been the only one to care for him for fear of him catching coronavirus.
“That was a privilege,” she said. “You get a strength when you’re nursing your loved one… and I’m glad I did.”
McDonald first began dating Rothe in 1980 when she was 17 years old, with the pair later getting together again in 2008 after meeting at ITV.
